Saturday 5 November 2016

You say Kimjongilia, I say Kimilsungia

He had revolutionary parents, his birth was foretold by a swallow, the appearance of a double rainbow over Mount Paekdu, and a new star in the heavens. Who else but Korea's Kim Jong Il...

...and his Begonia.

Among other things he claimed that he invented the hamburger, and that he wass the greatest golfer in history. He built a city right on the border of North and South Korea, just to trick South Koreans into defecting. He attempted to rid Pyongyang, the capital of North Korea, of short people, because he was angry about his height. Schoolchildren were taught that he never defecates. And, finally, his grand jewel of insanity, he had two South Korean directors kidnapped to kick-start North Korea’s film industry by forcing them to make a remake of Godzilla, only Communist. He claimed that North Korea is a paradise, where nobody ever experienced poverty, and where everybody leads a happy life. In real life, people are regularly tortured, and nearly all of them work in collective farms.

His father peerless character was also "fully reflected in the immortal flower" which is "blooming everywhere on the five continents.
An orchid.

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